Emotional Intelligence 2
(Wednesday)
Context:
In school, we give very little thought to how others are feeling. If we get a good grade and others around us get lower grades, we usually don’t give thought to how they might feel, and vice versa.
In our current educational system, there is little emphasis on understanding your classmates—knowing their experiences, feelings, or thoughts.
However, in the workplace, the ability to comprehend the thoughts and feelings of others is crucial for success, particularly for those in leadership or managerial roles.
Definition:
Empathy is a key to developing powerful and effective emotional intelligence.
Empathy is defined as the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.
Why it’s important: From Forbes magazine:
“Empathy has always been a critical skill for leaders, but it is taking on a new level of meaning and priority. Far from a soft approach, it can drive significant business results.
You always knew demonstrating empathy is positive for people, but new research demonstrates its importance for everything from innovation to retention. Great leadership requires a fine mix of all kinds of skills to create the conditions for engagement, happiness, and performance, and empathy tops the list of what leaders must get right.”
Read the complete article here: Empathy Is The Most Important Leadership Skill According To Research
Primer Questions
Do you remember a time when a family member or classmate reacted in a way that was not normal for them?
Was there a time where a friend or family member’s behavior towards you was unusual, but you understood the reasons behind their unusual behavior?
Can you remember a time when someone treated you in an unexpected way and you were not understanding – but felt bad when you later found out what they were going through?
Have you ever known what someone was feeling and why, but decided not to care? Why?
Write down your answers and observations in your journal.
How can I empathize?
Here are a few simple points to help you develop your ability to show empathy.
1) Practice looking at situations from other’s viewpoints. From your point of view, a situation or comment might not mean a lot or cause much emotional distress. Practice looking at the same situation or comments from different people's perspectives. See if and how changing your perspective changes how you feel.
2) Don’t be quick to judge. We often are quick to judge others when they react a certain way to a situation, or what is said or done. If we are judging, we can not empathize. So when trying to understand why someone is acting a specific way, or how they are feeling, get out of judgment first.
3) A simple key to developing your power of empathy is getting good at recognizing emotions. Is the person angry or frustrated? What’s the difference? Are they sad or disappointed? Again, is there a difference between the two? The better you get at identifying emotions and nuances between similar emotions, the easier it will be for you to empathize with others.
What would you say to a friend who didn’t get a promotion and was:
1) Angry
2) Disappointed
3) Devastated
Write your response in your journal. Explain how, if or why your what you would say could change based on what your friend was feeling.
Is developing emotional intelligence really that big of a deal?
Most students today would rather spend time and effort getting ‘good’ grades than develop their ability to understand and react to others’ emotions in an appropriate way. Wouldn’t you agree?
Many feel that emotional intelligence has no meaning or use in the workplace. However, consider the points from Forbes magazine:
A study published in the Academy of Management Journal found when people are on the receiving end of rudeness at work, their performance suffers and they are less likely to help others. And a new study at Georgetown University found workplace incivility is rising and the effects are extensive, including reduced performance and collaboration, deteriorating customer experiences, and increased turnover.
Mental Health. A global study by Qualtrics found 42% of people have experienced a decline in mental health. Specifically, 67% of people are experiencing increases in stress while 57% have increased anxiety, and 54% are emotionally exhausted. 53% of people are sad, 50% are irritable, 28% are having trouble concentrating, 20% are taking longer to finish tasks, 15% are having trouble thinking and 12% are challenged to juggle their responsibilities.
How you treat others matters. Watch the following video.
Answer the following questions in your journal:
1) How do you feel when someone doesn’t take into consideration your situation or what you’re going through?
2) Have you ever been visibly upset or distraught, and yet people didn’t even notice?
3) Are you able to notice when someone is having a hard time or a bad day? If so, do you treat them differently or not? Why?
Thought of the day.
“You can only understand people if you feel them in yourself.” – John Steinbeck.